Under a sky full of stars and a bright crescent moon they gathered on the beach after dusk, stoked the fire and shared their stories. Trials, heartache, lessons. Was it the lunar cycle or their age? No matter, it’s obvious these women are in the thick of it.
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I think the New Year can be a real mixed bag. On the one hand, as you near the end of the year you are celebrating and pushing every excess you might dare, knowing that January 1 offers you a clean slate. You feel invincible, and that anything you've done to yourself and others can be erased with a swish of a calendar page. On the other hand, you're coming down from extraordinary high times...time off work, time with loved ones, time alone, party time! Creating a balance, and a way to ease into the New Year is a challenge. I used to spend lots of time setting my "Goals" for each new January. Then I realized that I NEVER GO BACK AND REVIEW THEM. And they sit quietly, patiently waiting for me, in the lovely red journal I bought for myself more than five years ago. What's different this year? I'm limiting myself to this post, and 10 minutes to jot down a few manageables. We don't have time to belabor this, do we? I want to make shit happen.
I've broken it down to a few categories that provide plenty of room for multiple resolutions. Three's a crowd? Just pick one or two. Rules? Keep it simple and direct. Active not passive. "Oh, so I'm going to be more healthy." "I'm packing healthy snacks to bring to work everyday."
1. Micro-Resolution: Pick something tiny! I strongly believe it's the little things that make a difference. My husband made a mid-year resolution to make the bed everyday. He's done it, kept to it, and receives uber satisfaction from the practice. Gretchen Rubin gives this little change A LOT of attention in The Happiness Project, which is essentially a year of resolutions. I consider her an expert on the subject.
2. Health Resolution: Who hasn't picked something health-related as a new year resolve? Go for it! If you have a list of desired changes, try setting and achieving them quarterly instead of tackling them all right out of the gate. Set the goal, establish the habit for three months, then hit up another. Bam!
3. Personal/Professional/Parental Resolution: Sure, you can establish one for each of your personas. OR just focus on ONE area that needs extra attention: "I'm saying 'yes' to my kids as often as possible." or "I'm only going to swear at work if it's an actual emergency." or "I'm going to increase my sociability and engage with the other soccer moms instead of playing Words With Friends on my iPhone."
4. Maintenance Resolution: Say Yes to Success! What's one thing you have accomplished or felt great success from in 2013? Will you vow to keep it going? Maintaining is almost MORE critical than creating the habit. Plus, it's nice to have a leg up on one of your resolutions. Consider it an easy win.
New Year's Magic: An article published yesterday in The Atlantic, sparked my curiosity about the parallels of religion and New Year's traditions (excess, celebration, coming clean).
Making New Year's Resolutions: 5 Key Questions to ask Yourself, at The Happiness Project
I firmly believe that our thoughts and passions (for better or worse) can be channeled to fruition. However that does not mean I live my life passively, depending solely on optimism, visualization, magic spells and meditation. I'm ready to grab it, and take action, with the following rules guiding my steps:
Yes! Think and act with optimism and gratitude, and you will attract the good stuff. The opposite is true if you are negative, bitter, and trapped in your ego.
BELIEVE. Have faith in what you cannot see.
You cannot be lazy and passive. You must act and be proactive. Good things DON'T just happen to those who WAIT. Are you kidding me? Get up.
We need to love our families, respect our neighbors, adore our friends, and tolerate our enemies. It works. The nicer you are, the more amazing the results. I know sometimes it hurts. But try it.
Write it down. Yes, a vision board is lovely, but it's been proven to me time and again, writing stuff down is so important. Did you know it's been scientifically shown that WRITING your goals (dreams and desires!) contributes greatly to their actualization. This works in combination with accountability and commitment. Shocking! right? Okay, now grab a buddy and get on program.